Fishing jokes wanted

[MBLMIKE]

I Heard about this guy that had a big bucket of fish the game warden came over and asked him if he could see his license the guy replied I dont need a license because he was not fishing . the game warden said well how about this big bucket of fish? the guy says these are my pet fish I bring them out here for a swim to get some exercise .I put them in and they swim around for awhile then I call them back and they jump back in the bucket . The game warden says wow I never heard of that before show me . the guy takes the bucket and lowers it down into the water and sure enough the fish all swim out of the bucket, and after they hang around awhile they slowly swim away . the game warden says ok now call the fish back the guy replys what fish !

[trollingfool]

Know what the definition of fishing really is!!!! A jerk at one end of the pole waiting for a jerk at the other end.

[penalty box]

two blondes are fishing each side of the river, the one blonde says how do I get to the other side of the river, the other blonde replies you are on the other side.

[Deadeye1420]

There was a priest who went to the fish market to get sum fish. All they had was dam fish. The priest asked, "Why do they call it dam fish?" "Well, because it's found under the dam." So the priest says, "Okay, I will take it home."



That night at supper the priest says, "Will you hand me the dam fish?" The son says, "Well, hell, dad if you're gonna talk like that, can you hand me the f@@king potatoes?"

[rsfrail]

All ****.....I just want to put boat back in water an go fishing to see what breaks this year, NO JOKE!!!!

[Dr.Ed]

I heard this story while fishing in Babe Winkelman's territory on northern Minnesota. An avid walleye fisherman was taken in by the tales of all the big pike being taken up there so he drove 10 hours to a well known lake, rented a cabin and a boat and motor and fished for six days trying everything without one bite. On the seventh and last day of his vacation, at the crack of dawn, he was walking down to the dock for one last shot at a trophy fish when a woman came running toward his screaming, "My Fifi...My Fifi...Help me please!" The fisherman tried to calm the woman to no avail. She was hysterical. In a soothing voice he quietly asked her what happened. She explained through her tears that she was walking her poodle by the end of the pier when the biggest fish she had ever seem, leaped out of the water and grabbed the little dog. Still trying to calm the frantic woman and at the same time getting a little excited, he took her by the hand, looked her straight in the eye and asked, "Ma'am, what color was your dog?

[skipper9]

**Disclaimer** I am a Buckeye fan. No Wolverines were harmed in the telling of this joke

One upon a time there was a Buckeye fan and a Wolverine fan night fishing on opposites sides of a river. The Wolverine noticed that the Buckeye was catching fish one after another and yelled across, "What are you using for bait?" The Buckeye replied, "Worms." The Wolverine said, "So am I. How come you are catching fish and I'm not?" The Buckeye replied, "I have a hole over here and everytime I throw my bait into it, I catch a fish. Why don't you come over here and fish with me?"

The Wolverine agreed and looked around for a bridge. He called back, " I don't see anyway across." The Buckeye picks up his flashlight and shines it across the river. He says, "Just walk across the beam to this side." The Wolverine thinks about it for a minute and says, " Hell no, you'll turn that light off before I get halfway across!"

[MBLMIKE]

A man became notorious for catching fish in all weather conditions he got so well known that the fish and game dept. decided to ck on his technicque so they dispatched an official out to go with him the next time he went fishing after a few minutes in his boat they arrived at the spot he fished .
the man leaned over and opened his tackle box and pulled out a stick of dynamite lit it threw it into the water there was a huge exsplosion and one after another the fish began to float to the top he began to pick them up filling the boat with the biggest ones .
the game warden completely shocked began shouting at the man you cant do that ! the man slowly pulled out another stick of dynamite out of his tackle box lit it and handed it to the officer and said are you going to keep jabbin or fish ?

[MBLMIKE]

I got a new fly rod and reel for my wife . Best deal I ever made !

[MBLMIKE]

Take The Bait
It was a cold winter day, when an old man walked out onto a frozen lake, cut a hole in the ice, dropped in his fishing line and began waiting for a fish to bite.

He was there for almost an hour without even a nibble when a young boy walked out onto the ice, cut a hole in the ice not too far from the old man and dropped in his fishing line. It only took about a minute and WHAM! a Largemouth Bass hit his hook and the boy pulled in the fish.

The old man couldn't believe it but figured it was just luck. But, the boy dropped in his line and again within just a few minutes pulled in another one.

This went on and on until finally the old man couldn't take it any more since he hadn't caught a thing all this time.

He went to the boy and said, "Son, I've been here for over an hour without even a nibble. You have been here only a few minutes and have caught about half a dozen fish! How do you do it?"

The boy responded, "Roo raf roo reep ra rums rrarm."

"What was that?" the old man asked.

Again the boy responded, "Roo raf roo reep ra rums rarrm."

"Look," said the old man, "I can't understand a word you are saying."

So, the boy spit into his hand and said, "You have to keep the worms warm!"